141- Cadence - The Price of Love - gumdroprain - original

[gumdroprain.livejournal.com]

Title: The Price of Love
Fandom: Original
Prompt: Cadence
Warnings: mention of blood and slight reference to abuse
Rating: T
Summary: A full circle of love.
A/N: Takes place in the same world as Rights of a Monster. This has a few mentions but the story should still make sense without reading the previous sections.

 

"Disciplining is loving," our parents would say as they wiped away our tears after our punishment. That never made sense to either me or my sister because, seriously? How in the world did spanking and yelling show a person's love? At that age, both her and me thought love was supposed to be soft and sweet like the nights we cuddled together by the fireplace, drifting off to sleep under Mama's kisses and whispers of peaceful dreams.
 
That was what love was supposed to be. It wasn't supposed to be painful or hurt. During our 'late' night talks, me and my sister thought that was 'fake' love. They just called it love so they could do it. Really, they just did it out of anger. (And that made complete sense to us at the time, because Mama and Dad only 'disciplined' us when they were angry.)
 
Of course, that was when we were young. When we grew older, we understood the whys and the hows, but I think, always subconsciously, love was not supposed to be painful. That was before my sister slashed my face.
 
I still don't remember much about it. I can remember everything to that point but then, my mind freezes and I don't know. I couldn’t figure out why she attacked me in the middle of the night, changing me into an ugly freak, and then disappearing like that.
 
All I knew was that I was almost killed in that attack. It hurts to talk and to smile now.
 
And, that I did something really, really wrong. Why else would she attack me? I knew this had to be reason because she only disfigured my face, nothing else. It was probably because she didn't want me as her sister, her own twin, and (maybe) a part of her. (She's part of me though, a broken dead part).
 
After all, she's gone.
 
She killed herself in name and family with what she did. None of us could figure out why she did that for a long time. I mean, what could have happened to cause that? Xun was always the mature, big sister who lived and loved (was I included?) with all of her heart. She was pretty much perfect in every single way as she was really good at analyzing and talented with her hands. She could make anything, from scarves and clothes to paper cranes.
 
And, she had made a thousand and one when I found her.

Years had passed, and it was time for the family to leave for the Court. They always asked for one representative to stay for their life (a slave to silken clothes and delicious food). Mama was supposed to go several years before but she needed to take care of me after the whole incident. The king was alright with it and decided to postpone it. But, now it was time.

It was time for me to go. I didn’t Mama to go as she belonged with Papa and shouldn’t be locked up in that maze of courts, rules, and formalities. That just didn’t fit with Mama who deserved to be free in the fields with Papa, deliberately defying the cadence of roles and places.

Just like Xun, who was so brave to leave not only without a goodbye, but with a bloody knife. She used it to cut the paper into perfect, little squares. There’s red dust on the edges of the cranes and they remind me of the price of freedom and love. Those were the two words she written in each and every crane. I wonder which wish came true.