tamingthemuse | #200 - Blood, Sweat, and Hysterics - Oh, Mickey! - <user site="livejournal.com" user="angelswilliam"

Title: Oh, Mickey!
Fandom: Glee
Characters: Main Cast
Prompt:

tamingthemuse #Blood, Sweat, and Hysterics
Rating: 13 & up
Genre: Dramedy
Word Count: 1400, per OpenOffice
Spoilers/Warnings: SPOILERS: Up to and including The Madonna Episode; WARNINGS: Mild profanity
Summary: Once again, Mercedes and Kurt are at the heart of merging a Glee/Cheerios routine that will make Sue happy that she's better than Mr. Shue but without offending Mr. Shue...or the glee club, for that matter.
Disclaimer: Not mine. The people who created, wrote, produced, and distributed the original characters and/or plots own everything this writing is based on. This is just me having fun. Besides, I'm broke, so you won't get nuttin' if you sue.
Feedback: Concrit and stroking are welcome. Flames will get R2-D2's CO₂ spray in the face.
Author's note: This is the first gLee fic I've ever posted. The only characters with whom I feel entirely familiar are Finn, Kurt, Artie, Will...and maybe Sue. Please, keep that in mind and be gentle.
Distribution: If I'm a member of your archive, community, forum, group, etc., please remind me if I don't post it. Anyone else, please comment with an invite.

"It might just work." Sue Sylvester nodded slowly, considering Kurt and Mercedes's suggestion for this week's pep rally as they sat across from her at her desk.

"Of course, it will," Mercedes affirmed. "You'll have the whole school rocking in the bleachers."

Kurt swiped his hand in a wide arc in front of them. "On the basketball court!" He stood. "Think of it! Mercedes and I in our Cheerio uniforms, leading the rest of the Glee Club in a made-for-cheerleaders number, while the rest of the Cheerios do the actual choreographed cheer routine. It will be a smash!"

Sue looked each of them square in the eyes. "It will be a smash...of the two of you if you make a fool of me in front of the entire school and make Will Schuester look like a genius. You got me?"

"Got you." "Understood."

"Good. Now, get out of my office."

~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Even though Kurt and Mercedes shared approximately the same height, he had to jog to keep up with her through the high school corridors.

"What if she doesn't like what we put together?" he cried over the din of students opening and slamming their locker doors. "She doesn't necessarily have discerning tastes...and she does have clout in the athletic department, so is perfectly capable of getting us smashed if we fail to please her."

Mercedes stopped dead in her tracks and turned to face him. "Listen, Mr. Negative. I'm doing this. You can be with me or not, but either way, she's gonna judge you for what I do because you were in her office with me, so I suggest you be with me."

Kurt swallowed hard. "I'm with you."

Mercedes nodded once. "Good. Now, has she ever 'smashed' us for anything we've done before, even when I went against what she told me to do?"

Kurt brightened. "No!"

Mercedes gave him a light swat on the shoulder. "There you go. Now, let's roll, baby. We've got some work to do."

~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~

"So, what do you guys think?" Mr. Schuester asked the glee club, leaning against the convex part of the grand piano by the drum set. He indicated Kurt and Mercedes, who were standing to his right.

"Depends, Mr. Schue." Puck said. "They serious?"

Everyone else laughed.

Will turned toward Puck and folded his arms. "C'mon, Puck."

"I think it'll be awesome," Brittany said from the back row of chairs on the risers. "I've always wanted to be in a music video."

Santana, sitting next to her as usual, rolled her eyes. "We aren't going to be in a music vid--"

Will held out a hand. "Santana? Never mind. It's not worth it." He refocused his attention on the entire group. "Now, I think these two have a great idea. You all know how hard Sue Sylvester has been trying to bring this club down. Are you going to let her do that, or are you going to let Mercedes and Kurt help us beat her at her own game? You all were accusing these two of being traitors when they joined the Cheerios, just like Sue did Quinn, Santana, and Brittany--"

Brittany raised her hand. "She didn't care about me."

Will cleared his throat and obliged her with a smile before continuing. "The point is, Kurt and Mercedes have thought of a great way to get everyone working together."

"I think we'll all agree that we've been there, done that, Mr. Schuester," Artie said.

"He speaks truth, Mr. Schue," Tina agreed.

Artie smiled at her, then continued. "I'm just saying, we've already done two collaborative numbers with the cheerleaders--"

"Cheerios--" Kurt interjected.

Artie sighed, tipping his head as he spared Kurt a brief glance. "Sorry. Cheer-i-os...and none of our efforts have ever been enough to get Miss Sylvester off our backs. I just think we should accept facts and focus our energies on our own endeavors rather than working to coordinate with another extracurricular organization."

Will opened his mouth to speak...

...and promptly forgot what he was going to say.

"I'm very disappointed in you, Artie," Kurt said, walking slowly toward Artie's wheelchair until he was looking down into his deep brown eyes. "I always felt a sort of kinship with you because we are both members of misunderstood minorities, but I now see that you're blind to the needs of a more integrated tomorrow." He shook his head sadly, then turned to walk back to where Mercedes stood. "Mr. Schue, if we may?"

Will, eyes wide, mouth agape, shook his head to clear it, then with a swipe of his hand, indicated the mostly empty floor of the room. "They're all yours."

Mercedes and Kurt shared a smile somewhere between conspiratory, mischievous, and victorious, the balance of which was anyone's guess.

"Okay, here's the thing," Mercedes told them. "Sue hates you--us--because we aren't Cheerios. She sees us as stealing money away from her piece of the school's pie. So, sure she's gonna see everything we do, with her or without her, through less than rose-colored glasses. Well, the way Kurt and I see it, if we sing a song that sounds like cheerleading and is basically made for cheerleading choreography, how can she object to that? I mean, hell, you ever see the music video for this song? The chick is dressed up in a blue and white cheerleading outfit and carryin' pom-poms while she's singin'!"

"Yeah, and she's uglier than skank," Puck agreed, pinching his features together.

"You know, I always wondered...how ugly is skank?" Brittany asked.

"Oh, my God , someone gag her please!" Tina murmured less than quietly.

Will cleared his throat, pushing gently off the piano to walk around and stand between Mercedes and Kurt with his arms around each of them. "I think it's a great idea, and I think we need to start rehearsing right now." He looked first to Mercedes, then to Kurt. "You guys said Sue already agreed to the idea?" They both nodded. "Okay. Rehearsal here during class, and then after school with the Cheerios."

A collective groan resounded in the music room.

Will put his hand to his ear. "I'm sorry. Did I hear someone say they wanted to pay their own way...and everyone else's...to sectionals because the Cheerios got all the money?" The groaning stopped, followed by several sighs and tired stares. "Right. I know a lot of you are looking to get into 'The Biz.' Pride, my friends, will get you nowhere fast. Neither will lack of people skills. Work well with others, or get trampled under 1,000 tappers after someone changes the choreography without telling you. Now, c'mon. Let's get going. This is going to take a lot of hard work because this time? We're doing their style instead of ours."

"Yes, and how is that a good thing again?" Rachel spoke for the first time, making Will blink repeatedly at the realization.

He turned to her. "Rachel, remember, pride is a bad thing. Working--"

"But, what about all those songs about having pride in yourself and loving yourself?"

He ran a hand over his face and into his hair. "Okay, Rachel, yes," he said, "some pride in yourself is important." A shy smile spread across her face, her eyes twinkling. Will backed away a few paces and spread his arms wide, focusing on the whole group. "But, we all need to keep in mind that everyone needs to have pride in themselves, not just us. We need to share the wealth, leave some room for their pride to fit on stage with ours. Yes, there are 'leads' and 'backups...' but if you take the backups away, you'd be amazed at the emptiness of sound that's left behind the leads. Everyone is important in a performance. Never forget that...about yourself or about the people around you."

He saw the members of his glee club looking at each other with new eyes, and he couldn't have been happier. They might work their asses off and yet again fail to get Sue Sylvester off her high horse of "Cheerios rule and Gleeks drool," but they still will have taken something away from the experience--something that would help them in their future goals, something that might've helped him achieve those same goals if he'd learned it when they did.