230- sericulture- Needle Point- akasakasan- BTVS

[akasakasan.livejournal.com]

Title: Needle Point
Fandom: BTVS 
Pairing: Spander
Prompt: 230- sericulture-tamingthemuse 
Warnings: Graphic mention of recreational drug use
Rating: R
Wordcount: ~1000
Disclaimer: Unfortunately the characters are only mine in my dreams. 


Summary: Xander's nursing an addiction to drugs and Spike kills two birds with one stone.

Author's notes- I'm going out now but I'm posting the story here before I do. I really want to look it over, spell check and correct it when I get back but here's the rough version if anyone wants to read it before I fiddle with it. The better version will be up in around 9 hours.
 

 Comments are loved and appreciated. Whether you love it or you hate it feel free to let me know

 

 

The day Xander confronted Larry in the school changing rooms all those years ago he’d expected Larry to break down and confess that he was the werewolf that was stalking Sunnydale. He’d expected fear, violence or even denial because Xander had been so sure that Larry’s dirty little secret was his transformations. What Xander had been in no way prepared for was for Larry to roll up his sleeves, casual as can be, and show him the unmistakable signs of drug use. And what came next, Larry offering him a try from a schoolbag practically overflowing with all sorts of drugs and Xander trying it, Xander wouldn’t ever have anticipated.

It was tragic that Larry had apologised before he died. Back when Xander started failing school and dropping in on Scooby meetings high as a kite and rearing for a fight, hands shaking and body twitching for action, Larry had come up to him before the smack down with the Major. Larry who had gotten clean by then looking his jittery frame up and down and eyes damp as the grip on Xander’s shoulder tightened to somewhere bordering painful.

“Xander, it’s not too late for you,” he’d whispered.

Xander’s brain sluggishly processed the idea that maybe after Graduation he would clean up his act. Later that night Xander shot up to Larry’s last moments playing on repeat in his mind. He next day he drove off on his adventure around America and some sane part of him was beyond grateful that his car broke down in Oxnard before he crashed it while souring on a high. Working at the Fabulous Ladies Club paid just enough for the drugs leaving barely enough to pay for food. It took all holidays before Xander had enough to pay for getting the car fixed, most of that time flying by in a haze of drug induced wonder.

When he finally got home the carefully constructed world Xander had built for himself crumbled into anarchy and disarray. His father had thrown all his belongings into the basement and Xander was faced with the realisation that he had to get a job before he got kicked out of even the damp and dingy basement that he had left. Most managers took one look at his bloodshot eyes and his trembling hands and wouldn’t even give him the time of day. Some were kinder but Xander still found himself losing more jobs more rapidly than he gained them.

The habit became worse rapidly as Buffy and Willow became engrossed in College, giggling about boys they met and stressing over subjects in which they learned about spider habits and sericulture and other things that Xander didn’t even begin to pretend to understand. Willow had worried about him back in High school but College had filled her mind with things infinitely more important. Giles occasionally looked at him strangely, even pityingly, but nobody asked or interfered. He was still useless in patrols, still made inappropriate jokes and wasn’t much help in research sessions and all it took was hiding his tremors and wearing long sleeves. So Xander slowly came apart, unravelled string by string, and there was nobody to care or take interest in him. And then along came Spike.

When Giles dumped the chipped vampire on him it seemed like the worst possible thing that could have happened. Xander tied him up for the first few nights, snuck hits while the vampire was sleeping or hid in the bathroom and shot up while Spike was watching TV with the follow turned on high but of course Spike was the first to take proper notice. It was inevitable really, with his preternatural senses. Spike didn’t say anything when he came home to find Xander sprawled on the floor with a needle dangling from his arm, instead hoisting him up and placing him in bed. After that Spike began looking at him like he was a pawn, a stoned bargaining chip with a vampire for a roommate.

Somewhere along the way the edges of their relationship blurred. Xander couldn’t pinpoint exactly what led up to it, when exactly their animosity evolved into a twisted distortion of affection but one moment the Scoobies were patrolling and the next Spike was dragging a bleeding Xander home, limp in his arms. Xander woke up, mouth tasting like fuzz and cloying cotton balls to find his wound gone and Spike asleep in bed next to him, his lips smeared in blood.  

Leverage, Spike explained, was all about waiting until for the exact moment to throw down your cards and declare your victory. Leverage was about shooting up and bleeding in exchange for Spike’s silence. Leverage was about your life riding on a vampires word, on being a vampire’s suck whore for just one more hit and then another and then one more. Spike could taste the drugs in Xander’s blood and his expression grew more pleased every damn day.

Lying on Xander’s rumpled bed covers in the stifling basement, both of them riding a dizzying high Spike leaned close to Xander’s ear.

 “When I get my chip out we’ll go somewhere special, pet. I’ll show you the world outside these walls  and then you can really sour your wings and fly,” Spike growled. Xander’s head was cushioned on Spike’s thigh , the vampire running his fingers through his curls and Xander was as close to contentment as he had ever dreamed of being.

 

 

Comments

[sparrow2000.livejournal.com]

Oh that was harsh and I mean that as a compliment! Really nicely done, but harsh.

I'll be shivering, thinking about this all day.

[akasakasan.livejournal.com]

Thank you for leaving such a lovely comment! I'm glad you enjoyed it, although I'm sorry I made you shiver. *hands you a cup of warm cocoa*

Glad you enjoyed it. :D

[etaureau.livejournal.com]

Wow. Twisting Larry's secret to that end - high on drugs and the bite. And the ending is perfect. Spike is true to his demon.

Fabulous!

[akasakasan.livejournal.com]

Thank you for commenting! I'm really glad you enjoyed it, particularly the ending because it took several versions before I settled on an ending I was happy with.

Glad you liked it. :D

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