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tamingthemuseAUTHOR'S NOTE: I am desperately seeking a co-author, preferably one who can write Angel to my Spike. E-mail me or PM me on livejournal.
AUTHOR: Salustra
E-MAIL: Salustra: goddess_salustra@juno.com
TITLE: Victory Verse-Sacrifice part 2
RATING: NC-17
PAIRING: Spike/Angel
SUMMARY: The curse is broken and Spike returns. Done for tamingthemuse #350-sarcasm.
Distribution: Various lists, Wierd Romance Yahoo Group- http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WierdRomance ;
My livejournal - http://salustra.livejournal.com/ ; and the website Weird Romances- http://www.freewebs.com/salustra/wr/index.html . No posting elsewhere without express permission please.
SPOILERS: Through Angel S5 x08 - "Destiny"
CONTENT: mentions of torture, non-con sex, tentacle sex, psychological damage.
DISCLAIMER: Playing wit the boys, but we’re just having fun. No money made, don’t sue us!
FEEDBACK: Yes please.
Length: 3,272 words.
It was ninety minutes til the end of the twenty-four hours. I'd managed to work out a path for me to pace back and forth, because I couldn't just sit still while I was waiting. I was hoping whatever was going on...Oh, let's face it, I was just uncomfortable because he wasn't here. Also because I don't trust Thool demons, and I know I've crossed the path of high muckity-muck Ka'Dath before.
Wes was sitting in the room, trying to keep me company. He watched me pace with a tiny smile. "You're going to press a path into the carpet doing that. So either you're worried or you're trying to get your exercise."
"I could do without the sarcasm, Wes. I'm worried, okay? Spike has a talent for finding trouble." My tone was gruff, a cover for my worry and Wes knew it. He went back to reading his book and waiting with me.
An hour before the time was up, a piece of paper appeared, along with a tiny whoosh and bang. That transport spell must be pretty handy. Wes scurried over and picked it up gingerly. "It says, once this is read your curse will be broken. In one hour your catamite will be returned to you." The scroll turned into smoke.
I felt my feet touch upon the floor. I reached out, and stepped forward, and touched Wes on the shoulder. "Broken all right." I frowned, as the rest of the words took hold. "Catamite? He called Spike..." I growled. "He better not have touched him." Then I staggered a bit as I tried to walk to the door. "Harmony!" I bellowed. "Blood, lots of it!"
She came in a few moments later with a couple of large thermoses of warmed blood. I started downing them, and gestured to her for more. It took a lot until I felt sated, and the blood started working its magic on me. While I was drinking, nothing else mattered. I could feel Wes' eyes on me, worried eyes. I remembered, even though he didn't, that he pulled me out of the ocean and fed me when I was starved and driven mad by hunger. Much longer and I would not have been able to come back from madness. I had to wonder if Ka'Dath knew about that. Starving to death, he couldn't have chosen a better torture for me if he tried.
By the time the hour was nearly up, though, I was back to feeling almost normal. I was waiting, still pacing, somewhat enjoying the sensation of being able to take proper strides and feel the floor underneath me. I had Harmony bring in some thermoses of warmed blood, just in case. My mind shied away from what the just in case might be. By this time Gunn, Fred, and Lorne had joined us to wait for Spike's return.
At the end of the hour, there was a flash and bang, a small one, and a bundle of clothes appeared. Spike's clothes. Then a large flash and bang, and the naked figure of Spike was on the floor. He was curled into a fetal ball, his eyed screwed tightly shut. His body was a mass of bruises and welts and whipmarks, all things that would heal. I gave out a silent prayer of thanks for that, habit really, I doubt God listens to even a souled vampire. There was a paper in front of him, lettered large enough to see easily. 'He agreed to this of his own free will.'
"Spike," I said softly. "Gonna get you upstairs and we'll take care of everything."
I moved over to pick him up and his eyes opened. They were wide and unfocused and he skittered backwards on hands and knees. He shrieked, an unearthly screech that cut through me like shards of glass. "No! Don't touch me!
Time's up, you promised. I don't agree, don't touch me!" He pulled up his knees against his chest, and he was shuddering and shaking, though his eyes were amber and he'd gone into gameface.
I felt heartsick as I realized I recognized the look, the broken and fearful look and the cowering. Angelus had reduced Spike to this maybe a handful of times. And I knew exactly how much it took to bring Spike to this as a fledge. I could not imagine what it took to break the Spike of today. But why was he frightened of me?
It was Fred who broke the tension of the scene, ever so slightly. She picked up a blanket and walked closer to Spike. "Spike, it's Fred. You look cold, Spike, let me wrap a blanket around you."
Spike looked up at her wide-eyed but he didn't otherwise react as she inched closer, and managed to cover most of his naked body with the blanket. The gameface retreated, and he gripped the blanket around himself, hugging it close, and rocking. His eyes would periodically dart over to me fearfully, then back to fixate on Fred.
Fred glanced at Harmony. "Bring me the thermoses, would you please Harmony?" Harmony came over, and Spike moved his stare to her until she'd given Fred the containers of blood and moved away. Fred opened one and handed it to Spike. He sniffed it, then grabbed it and began chugging the contents, not bothering to be neat.
That was wrong. As untidy as Spike was generally he didn't like to mess himself or waste blood. I gestured to Harmony to come close. Whispering her to avoid disturbing Spike, I said, "Harmony, get twenty human volunteers to donate a pint each for Spike to drink."
Her eyes widened a bit, "But boss, the 'no human blood' policy..."
I cut her off. "One, doesn't apply to Spike, he's not an employee, never signed a fucking contract, and two, get the damn blood already." I still kept my voice low but the tone got slightly dangerous, and Harmony quivered.
"Yes boss, right away." Then she moved quickly out of the office.
I looked back and Spike had already finished the second thermos and was licking the spillage off the blanket and wherever else he could reach it. What the hell did Ka'Dath do to him?
~~~ Almost 24 hours earlier ~~~
"Open your mouth," he said. Under normal circumstances, even tied to an altar I'd've made a wisecrack, but now I just did it. Fighting him was not going to do any good, I was supposed to be a willing sacrifice. For all I knew, fighting him would bugger the spell.
One of the tentacles produced a small bottle and poured the contents into my mouth. I expected some nasty potion but it was some kind of liquor instead. I swallowed it, and it gave me a pleasant warmth inside me. It distracted me momentarily as his tentacles began caressing over my skin. They'd changed, they were warmer and the skin softer and less slimy. And they hadn't touched any of the critical spots yet. Against my expectation I started to feel relaxed and slightly aroused. I could feel my brain starting to fuzz a bit. Yeah, probably drugged or enchanted liquor.
One of the tentacles took on a distinctly phallic shape at the tip and suddenly pushed into my half-open mouth. I let my mouth open to accommodate it, and the tentacle pushed deeper. Then it was as if all the tentacles had decided that was the cue to assault, and they were everywhere. One pushing into my ass, another that developed a tube on the end sucking and squeezing my cock, others touching and rubbing every other erogenous spot on my body. Even with all that I could feel a very thin thread-like one slide into one nostril and then it was like a button was being pushed in my brain. Like something stimulating the pleasure center directly and I had to close my eyes against the intensity. I came almost instantaneously, and the feeling didn't stop. Everything external disappeared and there was just pleasure, my brain, my cock, my ass, my body, greater then lesser, over and over. It was so much and so long it was beginning to be painful.
"That's the way, my beautiful boy," I heard whispered in my ear. I knew the voice, and the touch of the hands now stroking my chest. I recognized his scent, all cinnamon and musk and church incense. My brain screamed to me that it was impossible but I forced my eyes open and there he was. My Sire. It was impossible, some spell.
"You've brought me back," he whispered. "You're breaking all the curses tonight, my beautiful boy. Going to have you again." It was the slight brogue of Angelus, not the American accent Angel had developed. The tentacles were gone even though the pleasure wasn't. Angelus was stroking me, the hands I fetishized. He was kissing me, bruisingly, possessively.
"This is a spell or a trick," I gasped out at last when my mouth was free. "Can't be you."
"It is a spell, my clever boy," Angelus said. "You're still in the temple, he's still touching you. But you summoned me. Your sacrifice called me. He doesn't know I'm here. Going to make it easy on you, boy, for as long as I can. He shouldn't be touching you. You're mine, always have been, my treasure, my favored. I'll stay here and block your view, let you feel me instead of him."
"Now I know it's a trick. You wouldn't be here to help me just out of the goodness of your heart."
He snarled. "No goodness involved. Pure possessiveness. Don't like this slimy bastard touching what's mine. Especially to bring you pleasure. Don't want you thinking of anyone but me."
Things became a haze for a long time after that. But he stayed with me, almost to the end. Through the pleasure, and through most of the pain. Til the last hour. If it was him, if it wasn't a trick inside my head or part of the spell with Ka'Dath toying with me, or just a plain hallucination. But he knew all the endearments, knew our stories, our backgrounds, the secrets only we knew together. By the time he left I couldn't be sure. The torture was so intense, and then the pleasure, back and forth over and over. I was losing myself. But if he was real...then maybe I was going back to the office only to be in Angelus' possession.
~~~
Fred stayed near Spike, periodically saying something soothing to him in low tones. Spike looked like he was slowly coming back to himself. His shivering had stopped and the tight, frightened wariness was dispelling, bit by bit. He was still giving me the oddest looks though. He'd gone from avoiding looking to staring, studying me intensely. I just tried to stay calm and cool and not meet his gaze too often. I didn't want him freaking out on me again.
Harmony came back with the first pint of human blood fairly quickly. Spike perked up just smelling it from across the room, and he drank it down greedily. He sat there, hands wrapped around the mug, and he spoke for the first time since that horrified outburst earlier.
"I'm better now." His voice was raspy and raw, his throat obviously sore from screaming. "More of this coming?" He looked at me when he asked the question and I nodded. "Good," he said. "Been a hell of a day." He chuckled darkly at his own small jest.
Fred took a deep breath and asked the question we'd all been wanting to ask since he returned. "Spike, ummm, if you can, I mean don't if it's too much to...What happened?"
He tilted his hand and looked at Fred, his expression tender. "S'ok Fred. I'd be wondering too. He needed a willing sacrifice to torture and pleasure to break the spell. He wanted me." The words came out flat and matter-of-fact, so much so that they spoke volumes for how bad things had been. "Didn't have much choice, so I 'volunteered'." Then he looked up at me. "He made himself look like you, somehow, for most of it."
Harmony arrived with more blood and cut off any temptation on my part to ask for more details. But it certainly explained the outburst when I tried to pick him up. I couldn't blame him. And I felt my guts twist even more, knowing what he'd gone through, willingly, to free me. I certainly didn't deserve it.
Spike downed two pints without stopping, then he was able to slow down to long sips. He was visibly relaxing a the blood hit. The bruises and cuts had healed and he leaned back against the wall behind him. "It worked, I see." He gestured his head in the direction of the bundle of his clothes. "Can I get my kit on? I'm not shy about being naked or anything, just rather be dressed."
"Of course," said Fred, even as Wes scooped up the clothes to bring to me.
"May want to turn around." Spike waited a moment to make sure everyone was looking away.
I admit it, I peeked. I wanted to make sure he was really okay. Well that, and I could never turn down a chance to see Spike naked. He seemed fine, and I turned around and fidgeted. I never liked waiting.
A few minutes later, Spike called out, "All clear."
We all turned around. He looked like himself again. There was something about that duster and his doc marten boots that fit over him like armor. "Now let me at the rest of that blood. Then I'll want some whiskey." He gave me a ghost of a smile. "That good Irish stuff you hate me stealing."
I gave a small chuckle. "The good stuff it is." I move over to the bar and pull a couple of bottles of my private reserve out of the locked cabinet.
The whole room is held in tension. Everyone seems afraid to move, afraid to say anything. Spike felt it too, apparently, because he downed another cup of blood and looked around. "I'm awright enough. No need to hover."
The tension broke. "Everyone, back to work, you can all smother Spike with hugs and kisses later." That got smiles, and they all moved towards the door.
"Wes, can you hang on a minute?" Spike asked.
Wes turned and looked at Spike, and nodded. "Certainly."
The room emptied and Spike settled in his normal chair, draping a leg over the arm of the chair. Wes sat in another chair, and I sat down rather uncomfortably in my office chair behind my desk. I wanted to take Spike in my arms and feel every inch of him and make sure he was all right. It was painful, not being able to touch him yet.
"Wes, I need to ask, do Thool demons shapeshift? I'm not all that familiar with them." Spike faced Wes, and he continued to sip on his blood.
Wes fidgeted a bit in his chair. "Not that I've ever heard. But they are particularly skilled with magick, especially their ruling clans. It's entirely possible for him to have done a glamour."
Spike nodded. "Yeah, and he gave me some kind of drugged liquor first. I...I want you to check me out. You know, magickally and all. I need to make sure..." He paused, and cleared his throat. "I need to make sure there's nothing left behind on me. I'm going to Fred after for her to use her machines and do the same for the technological side. Just in case."
Wes took a deep breath, sighed, and nodded his head. "I'll go set up for that, come on over when you're ready. I'll call Fred and let her know."
"Thanks Wes." Spike finished the last of the blood, and Wes got up and left the office.
At last we were alone. Spike got up, grabbed the two bottles of whiskey, and placed one in front of me. "You're gonna need it, probably. I know I do." He took his place in the chair again, and unscrewed the top from the whiskey. He tipped it up, downing about a third of the bottle before he lowered it again.
I opened mine and poured a glass, sipping at it, watching him, waiting to see what came next.
He sighed and put the top back on the bottle. "I have to go find Wes in a minute, but there's some things you should know. Can't tell them, don't want you to tell them either." He looked down at his hands, and kept his gaze there as he started talking again. "The last hour...it wasn't for the spell. At least that's what he said. He used smelling salts to make sure I was alert. He said, 'I want you conscious for this. I want you to tell him about this, and let him know you and he will never be intimate again without thinking of this'."
I had to fight for control not to crush the glass in my hand. I downed what was in it and set the glass aside so I'd be safe from the temptation to do just that as Spike continued.
"He shoved some kind of hard tube in my mouth. I assume to keep it open and to keep me from using teeth. Then two of his tentacles..." Spike paused, and he closed his eyes, and the strain on him was visible as he made himself continue. "Started thinning out and getting longer and longer. One started down my mouth, and the other up my ass, and...and they kept going, and going, and going." He gritted his teeth. "Til they met in the goddamned middle. Not gonna try to describe how it felt. I don't wanna think about it much longer. I was violated. He said he was going to violate me like no one else ever could, and he did."
He paused. I opened my mouth to try to say something and he raised his hand to stop me, shaking his head.
"I don't know if he's right. But I do know..." He stopped and swallowed hard. "Not gonna be able to face anything like sex for a while. Maybe a long while. If you can understand that, I'll be in our bed tonight. You let me know by wearing some underwear to bed. Cos I'll be wearing underwear at the very least. If you don't think you can deal with it... I'll be on the couch instead."
I wanted to speak but he still held up the hand.
"Angel, please, no. If you say something right now I'll fall apart and I need to know if he left anything in me or on me. I have to go get tested and I have to keep my Big Bad face on for a little while longer. You think, and you decide. I'll come up when the tests are done." He got up, keeping the bottle gripped in his hand, and briskly walked out the door.
Spike was right. I did need the whiskey. To hell with the glass, I started drinking from the bottle. He was wrong about one thing, I didn't need to think about whether or not I'd wear underwear to bed tonight. I'd be near him however he let me, on whatever terms. I just had to think about what the hell I was going to do about Ka'Dath and how I was going to help Spike....
AUTHOR: Salustra
E-MAIL: Salustra: goddess_salustra@juno.com
TITLE: Victory Verse-Sacrifice part 2
RATING: NC-17
PAIRING: Spike/Angel
SUMMARY: The curse is broken and Spike returns. Done for tamingthemuse #350-sarcasm.
Distribution: Various lists, Wierd Romance Yahoo Group- http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WierdRomance ;
My livejournal - http://salustra.livejournal.com/ ; and the website Weird Romances- http://www.freewebs.com/salustra/wr/index.html . No posting elsewhere without express permission please.
SPOILERS: Through Angel S5 x08 - "Destiny"
CONTENT: mentions of torture, non-con sex, tentacle sex, psychological damage.
DISCLAIMER: Playing wit the boys, but we’re just having fun. No money made, don’t sue us!
FEEDBACK: Yes please.
Length: 3,272 words.
It was ninety minutes til the end of the twenty-four hours. I'd managed to work out a path for me to pace back and forth, because I couldn't just sit still while I was waiting. I was hoping whatever was going on...Oh, let's face it, I was just uncomfortable because he wasn't here. Also because I don't trust Thool demons, and I know I've crossed the path of high muckity-muck Ka'Dath before.
Wes was sitting in the room, trying to keep me company. He watched me pace with a tiny smile. "You're going to press a path into the carpet doing that. So either you're worried or you're trying to get your exercise."
"I could do without the sarcasm, Wes. I'm worried, okay? Spike has a talent for finding trouble." My tone was gruff, a cover for my worry and Wes knew it. He went back to reading his book and waiting with me.
An hour before the time was up, a piece of paper appeared, along with a tiny whoosh and bang. That transport spell must be pretty handy. Wes scurried over and picked it up gingerly. "It says, once this is read your curse will be broken. In one hour your catamite will be returned to you." The scroll turned into smoke.
I felt my feet touch upon the floor. I reached out, and stepped forward, and touched Wes on the shoulder. "Broken all right." I frowned, as the rest of the words took hold. "Catamite? He called Spike..." I growled. "He better not have touched him." Then I staggered a bit as I tried to walk to the door. "Harmony!" I bellowed. "Blood, lots of it!"
She came in a few moments later with a couple of large thermoses of warmed blood. I started downing them, and gestured to her for more. It took a lot until I felt sated, and the blood started working its magic on me. While I was drinking, nothing else mattered. I could feel Wes' eyes on me, worried eyes. I remembered, even though he didn't, that he pulled me out of the ocean and fed me when I was starved and driven mad by hunger. Much longer and I would not have been able to come back from madness. I had to wonder if Ka'Dath knew about that. Starving to death, he couldn't have chosen a better torture for me if he tried.
By the time the hour was nearly up, though, I was back to feeling almost normal. I was waiting, still pacing, somewhat enjoying the sensation of being able to take proper strides and feel the floor underneath me. I had Harmony bring in some thermoses of warmed blood, just in case. My mind shied away from what the just in case might be. By this time Gunn, Fred, and Lorne had joined us to wait for Spike's return.
At the end of the hour, there was a flash and bang, a small one, and a bundle of clothes appeared. Spike's clothes. Then a large flash and bang, and the naked figure of Spike was on the floor. He was curled into a fetal ball, his eyed screwed tightly shut. His body was a mass of bruises and welts and whipmarks, all things that would heal. I gave out a silent prayer of thanks for that, habit really, I doubt God listens to even a souled vampire. There was a paper in front of him, lettered large enough to see easily. 'He agreed to this of his own free will.'
"Spike," I said softly. "Gonna get you upstairs and we'll take care of everything."
I moved over to pick him up and his eyes opened. They were wide and unfocused and he skittered backwards on hands and knees. He shrieked, an unearthly screech that cut through me like shards of glass. "No! Don't touch me!
Time's up, you promised. I don't agree, don't touch me!" He pulled up his knees against his chest, and he was shuddering and shaking, though his eyes were amber and he'd gone into gameface.
I felt heartsick as I realized I recognized the look, the broken and fearful look and the cowering. Angelus had reduced Spike to this maybe a handful of times. And I knew exactly how much it took to bring Spike to this as a fledge. I could not imagine what it took to break the Spike of today. But why was he frightened of me?
It was Fred who broke the tension of the scene, ever so slightly. She picked up a blanket and walked closer to Spike. "Spike, it's Fred. You look cold, Spike, let me wrap a blanket around you."
Spike looked up at her wide-eyed but he didn't otherwise react as she inched closer, and managed to cover most of his naked body with the blanket. The gameface retreated, and he gripped the blanket around himself, hugging it close, and rocking. His eyes would periodically dart over to me fearfully, then back to fixate on Fred.
Fred glanced at Harmony. "Bring me the thermoses, would you please Harmony?" Harmony came over, and Spike moved his stare to her until she'd given Fred the containers of blood and moved away. Fred opened one and handed it to Spike. He sniffed it, then grabbed it and began chugging the contents, not bothering to be neat.
That was wrong. As untidy as Spike was generally he didn't like to mess himself or waste blood. I gestured to Harmony to come close. Whispering her to avoid disturbing Spike, I said, "Harmony, get twenty human volunteers to donate a pint each for Spike to drink."
Her eyes widened a bit, "But boss, the 'no human blood' policy..."
I cut her off. "One, doesn't apply to Spike, he's not an employee, never signed a fucking contract, and two, get the damn blood already." I still kept my voice low but the tone got slightly dangerous, and Harmony quivered.
"Yes boss, right away." Then she moved quickly out of the office.
I looked back and Spike had already finished the second thermos and was licking the spillage off the blanket and wherever else he could reach it. What the hell did Ka'Dath do to him?
~~~ Almost 24 hours earlier ~~~
"Open your mouth," he said. Under normal circumstances, even tied to an altar I'd've made a wisecrack, but now I just did it. Fighting him was not going to do any good, I was supposed to be a willing sacrifice. For all I knew, fighting him would bugger the spell.
One of the tentacles produced a small bottle and poured the contents into my mouth. I expected some nasty potion but it was some kind of liquor instead. I swallowed it, and it gave me a pleasant warmth inside me. It distracted me momentarily as his tentacles began caressing over my skin. They'd changed, they were warmer and the skin softer and less slimy. And they hadn't touched any of the critical spots yet. Against my expectation I started to feel relaxed and slightly aroused. I could feel my brain starting to fuzz a bit. Yeah, probably drugged or enchanted liquor.
One of the tentacles took on a distinctly phallic shape at the tip and suddenly pushed into my half-open mouth. I let my mouth open to accommodate it, and the tentacle pushed deeper. Then it was as if all the tentacles had decided that was the cue to assault, and they were everywhere. One pushing into my ass, another that developed a tube on the end sucking and squeezing my cock, others touching and rubbing every other erogenous spot on my body. Even with all that I could feel a very thin thread-like one slide into one nostril and then it was like a button was being pushed in my brain. Like something stimulating the pleasure center directly and I had to close my eyes against the intensity. I came almost instantaneously, and the feeling didn't stop. Everything external disappeared and there was just pleasure, my brain, my cock, my ass, my body, greater then lesser, over and over. It was so much and so long it was beginning to be painful.
"That's the way, my beautiful boy," I heard whispered in my ear. I knew the voice, and the touch of the hands now stroking my chest. I recognized his scent, all cinnamon and musk and church incense. My brain screamed to me that it was impossible but I forced my eyes open and there he was. My Sire. It was impossible, some spell.
"You've brought me back," he whispered. "You're breaking all the curses tonight, my beautiful boy. Going to have you again." It was the slight brogue of Angelus, not the American accent Angel had developed. The tentacles were gone even though the pleasure wasn't. Angelus was stroking me, the hands I fetishized. He was kissing me, bruisingly, possessively.
"This is a spell or a trick," I gasped out at last when my mouth was free. "Can't be you."
"It is a spell, my clever boy," Angelus said. "You're still in the temple, he's still touching you. But you summoned me. Your sacrifice called me. He doesn't know I'm here. Going to make it easy on you, boy, for as long as I can. He shouldn't be touching you. You're mine, always have been, my treasure, my favored. I'll stay here and block your view, let you feel me instead of him."
"Now I know it's a trick. You wouldn't be here to help me just out of the goodness of your heart."
He snarled. "No goodness involved. Pure possessiveness. Don't like this slimy bastard touching what's mine. Especially to bring you pleasure. Don't want you thinking of anyone but me."
Things became a haze for a long time after that. But he stayed with me, almost to the end. Through the pleasure, and through most of the pain. Til the last hour. If it was him, if it wasn't a trick inside my head or part of the spell with Ka'Dath toying with me, or just a plain hallucination. But he knew all the endearments, knew our stories, our backgrounds, the secrets only we knew together. By the time he left I couldn't be sure. The torture was so intense, and then the pleasure, back and forth over and over. I was losing myself. But if he was real...then maybe I was going back to the office only to be in Angelus' possession.
~~~
Fred stayed near Spike, periodically saying something soothing to him in low tones. Spike looked like he was slowly coming back to himself. His shivering had stopped and the tight, frightened wariness was dispelling, bit by bit. He was still giving me the oddest looks though. He'd gone from avoiding looking to staring, studying me intensely. I just tried to stay calm and cool and not meet his gaze too often. I didn't want him freaking out on me again.
Harmony came back with the first pint of human blood fairly quickly. Spike perked up just smelling it from across the room, and he drank it down greedily. He sat there, hands wrapped around the mug, and he spoke for the first time since that horrified outburst earlier.
"I'm better now." His voice was raspy and raw, his throat obviously sore from screaming. "More of this coming?" He looked at me when he asked the question and I nodded. "Good," he said. "Been a hell of a day." He chuckled darkly at his own small jest.
Fred took a deep breath and asked the question we'd all been wanting to ask since he returned. "Spike, ummm, if you can, I mean don't if it's too much to...What happened?"
He tilted his hand and looked at Fred, his expression tender. "S'ok Fred. I'd be wondering too. He needed a willing sacrifice to torture and pleasure to break the spell. He wanted me." The words came out flat and matter-of-fact, so much so that they spoke volumes for how bad things had been. "Didn't have much choice, so I 'volunteered'." Then he looked up at me. "He made himself look like you, somehow, for most of it."
Harmony arrived with more blood and cut off any temptation on my part to ask for more details. But it certainly explained the outburst when I tried to pick him up. I couldn't blame him. And I felt my guts twist even more, knowing what he'd gone through, willingly, to free me. I certainly didn't deserve it.
Spike downed two pints without stopping, then he was able to slow down to long sips. He was visibly relaxing a the blood hit. The bruises and cuts had healed and he leaned back against the wall behind him. "It worked, I see." He gestured his head in the direction of the bundle of his clothes. "Can I get my kit on? I'm not shy about being naked or anything, just rather be dressed."
"Of course," said Fred, even as Wes scooped up the clothes to bring to me.
"May want to turn around." Spike waited a moment to make sure everyone was looking away.
I admit it, I peeked. I wanted to make sure he was really okay. Well that, and I could never turn down a chance to see Spike naked. He seemed fine, and I turned around and fidgeted. I never liked waiting.
A few minutes later, Spike called out, "All clear."
We all turned around. He looked like himself again. There was something about that duster and his doc marten boots that fit over him like armor. "Now let me at the rest of that blood. Then I'll want some whiskey." He gave me a ghost of a smile. "That good Irish stuff you hate me stealing."
I gave a small chuckle. "The good stuff it is." I move over to the bar and pull a couple of bottles of my private reserve out of the locked cabinet.
The whole room is held in tension. Everyone seems afraid to move, afraid to say anything. Spike felt it too, apparently, because he downed another cup of blood and looked around. "I'm awright enough. No need to hover."
The tension broke. "Everyone, back to work, you can all smother Spike with hugs and kisses later." That got smiles, and they all moved towards the door.
"Wes, can you hang on a minute?" Spike asked.
Wes turned and looked at Spike, and nodded. "Certainly."
The room emptied and Spike settled in his normal chair, draping a leg over the arm of the chair. Wes sat in another chair, and I sat down rather uncomfortably in my office chair behind my desk. I wanted to take Spike in my arms and feel every inch of him and make sure he was all right. It was painful, not being able to touch him yet.
"Wes, I need to ask, do Thool demons shapeshift? I'm not all that familiar with them." Spike faced Wes, and he continued to sip on his blood.
Wes fidgeted a bit in his chair. "Not that I've ever heard. But they are particularly skilled with magick, especially their ruling clans. It's entirely possible for him to have done a glamour."
Spike nodded. "Yeah, and he gave me some kind of drugged liquor first. I...I want you to check me out. You know, magickally and all. I need to make sure..." He paused, and cleared his throat. "I need to make sure there's nothing left behind on me. I'm going to Fred after for her to use her machines and do the same for the technological side. Just in case."
Wes took a deep breath, sighed, and nodded his head. "I'll go set up for that, come on over when you're ready. I'll call Fred and let her know."
"Thanks Wes." Spike finished the last of the blood, and Wes got up and left the office.
At last we were alone. Spike got up, grabbed the two bottles of whiskey, and placed one in front of me. "You're gonna need it, probably. I know I do." He took his place in the chair again, and unscrewed the top from the whiskey. He tipped it up, downing about a third of the bottle before he lowered it again.
I opened mine and poured a glass, sipping at it, watching him, waiting to see what came next.
He sighed and put the top back on the bottle. "I have to go find Wes in a minute, but there's some things you should know. Can't tell them, don't want you to tell them either." He looked down at his hands, and kept his gaze there as he started talking again. "The last hour...it wasn't for the spell. At least that's what he said. He used smelling salts to make sure I was alert. He said, 'I want you conscious for this. I want you to tell him about this, and let him know you and he will never be intimate again without thinking of this'."
I had to fight for control not to crush the glass in my hand. I downed what was in it and set the glass aside so I'd be safe from the temptation to do just that as Spike continued.
"He shoved some kind of hard tube in my mouth. I assume to keep it open and to keep me from using teeth. Then two of his tentacles..." Spike paused, and he closed his eyes, and the strain on him was visible as he made himself continue. "Started thinning out and getting longer and longer. One started down my mouth, and the other up my ass, and...and they kept going, and going, and going." He gritted his teeth. "Til they met in the goddamned middle. Not gonna try to describe how it felt. I don't wanna think about it much longer. I was violated. He said he was going to violate me like no one else ever could, and he did."
He paused. I opened my mouth to try to say something and he raised his hand to stop me, shaking his head.
"I don't know if he's right. But I do know..." He stopped and swallowed hard. "Not gonna be able to face anything like sex for a while. Maybe a long while. If you can understand that, I'll be in our bed tonight. You let me know by wearing some underwear to bed. Cos I'll be wearing underwear at the very least. If you don't think you can deal with it... I'll be on the couch instead."
I wanted to speak but he still held up the hand.
"Angel, please, no. If you say something right now I'll fall apart and I need to know if he left anything in me or on me. I have to go get tested and I have to keep my Big Bad face on for a little while longer. You think, and you decide. I'll come up when the tests are done." He got up, keeping the bottle gripped in his hand, and briskly walked out the door.
Spike was right. I did need the whiskey. To hell with the glass, I started drinking from the bottle. He was wrong about one thing, I didn't need to think about whether or not I'd wear underwear to bed tonight. I'd be near him however he let me, on whatever terms. I just had to think about what the hell I was going to do about Ka'Dath and how I was going to help Spike....
