Her Saving Grace, 21/25, Spike/Fred, R

[authoressnebula.livejournal.com]

*gasps* Can it be? I'm updating before Saturday?

Don't die of shock, now. You've got another chapter to read. And HSG is officially finished; it's a matter of inserting the prompt word and posting the chapters now. ^_^

Title: Her Saving Grace
Rating: R
Pairing: Spike/Fred, Buffy/Xander, mentions of previous Fred/Wesley
Spoilers: Angel S5
Chapter: Twenty-one of Twenty-five
Prompt: #44 - Riposte for tamingthemuse
Warnings: Character death (not the permanent variety)
Summary: An accident one night changes Fred's entire world. Shunned by the people who should care the most, she turns to the one person who does care, and finds something beyond friendship.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Seriously. Not even my mind these days.

Previous Parts Here

Word count: 1807


Pretty by mentalme85

Chapter 21: Sitting Still

“We'll find her,” Buffy promised again. “I swear, Spike, we'll find her.”

Spike only nodded. What else was he supposed to do? Grin and bear it? Fred was gone, and who knew where.

They'd been attacked from all flanks, and Spike had shouted a warning before someone had brought down a wooden plank on her head. She'd gone down, and he'd seen red. There'd been a lot of them, so he'd distributed the red evenly amongst them all.

Then he'd turned back for her and had found her being carried away by two of them into a vehicle. Before he could blink, they'd hauled her in, shut the door, and driven away.

“We've got lots of resources available, and lots of options,” Xander added in. “I could tell you not to worry, but that'd be like telling Buffy not to bench press as much as she can.”

“I know,” Spike muttered. He hated this. He'd promised her he'd keep her safe, and look where it had gotten them. Her taken and hurt and who the hell knew where.

Buffy rose from her seat in front of him. “I'm going to call Angel, let him know what's going on,” she told them. “I'll be back fast.”

Spike continued to stare at the floor. There wasn't anything else he could do. He didn't have anyone to beat on, which is what he really wanted to do. Right now, he had to sit tight, help figure out where she was, and during all of it, wait.

He didn't wait very well.

“You look better than you did in Sunnydale.”

Spike slowly raised his head to gaze at Xander. Small talk, then. He was confused at the sincerity in Xander's tone, though. “What do you mean?”

“I wouldn't say healthier, because it's the wrong term, but...” Xander bit his lip before continuing. “Better. Happier. More whole, I think.”

Spike stared, before he began to nod. “I am,” he said, and he was amazed at how much he meant it. He'd been good in Sunnydale. Top of his game in fighting, and definitely top dog when it came to insults and sarcastic responses. He remembered a night he and Xander had had a contest to see who could come up with the best come back phrases. They'd riposted back and forth for most of the night, and Spike had finally been crowned the victor at about four in the morning.

LA hadn't been any more difficult or easy than Sunnydale had been, though it should've been with Angel around. Had Fred made that much of a difference in his life?

Yes. A very sure and solid yes. She made him smile and laugh and stirred a protective desire inside of him he hadn't felt since Drusilla. He was the knight in shining armor, and he was adored for it.

And for the first time ever, he had someone who cared about him as much as he cared about her.

Drusilla had been a take, not give type of girl. He'd been her knight again and again, saving her from her nightmares and from the townspeople who ran them out over and over until Prague. He'd never truly felt secure in that relationship, especially when she'd go off with another demon for awhile before coming back to him. He'd told himself that it was always him she'd come back to, but there shouldn't ever have been a reason for her to leave in the first place.

Harmony had adored him and put him on a pedestal much too high. She'd adored him for the sake of adoring and needing someone by her side, and hadn't given two cents about him. He'd given little in that relationship, to be honest, but she'd never given anything back. It had been a safe thing to give so little there.

Buffy had never needed protecting, except for that one year of disaster where she'd needed to be protected from her worst enemy: herself. After he'd left and gotten his soul, they'd bonded, no intimate moments like they'd had the year before, but they'd been closer than ever. He'd made a real friend in her, and he was glad that she was here now with him. They wouldn't work out as a couple.

Fred was the one he'd needed all along. Someone who needed him, someone who wanted him and needed him, someone who loved him and worried about him and kept him as safe as he kept her.

Except for now.

“She's good for you,” Xander told him. “I know it's her that's the reason you're looking so much better. She's a good person; you picked well.”

“So did you,” Spike found himself saying. He still wasn't sure about Buffy and Xander as a couple, but he knew that Xander had always depended on and adored her. Buffy had always cared about him, had always worried and fretted, but had given him the space he'd needed.

He could see that they were a lot like him and Fred. It wasn't fireworks; it was a slow burning fire that continued to burn in their hearts, and that fire wasn't going out anytime soon.

Xander blinked, as if surprised by Spike's words. “I...I actually thought you'd be mad,” he admitted, before sighing with relief. “You really mean that?”

“I do,” Spike said. “She needs you. I can tell she loves you by just the way she looks at you. You're her Xander. You always have been. I got a solid friendship with her, and that's part of my happiness now. She makes for a damn good friend.”

“I know,” Xander said, and the two exchanged a smile.

“Take care of her,” Spike told him. It was as if he were the father handing the bride over to the groom, except he wasn't Buffy's father, though he was old enough to be, and Fred really was rubbing off on him since he was rambling in his thoughts.

“I will,” Xander promised immediately. “I will.”

“Angel's on his way,” Buffy said, hurrying back into the living room. “He's bringing some back up; I don't think they have anything on the Black Thorn yet, either.”

Spike cursed under his breath. They had no clue where the Black Thorn even was, or if it was in this dimension, or anything that would help them get Fred back. He didn't even know names. None of them. No suspects to call or visit, no one to bloody well pound.

“I'm gonna go get the first aid kit,” Xander told him, rising. “You got banged up more than you think you did.”

He knew he'd been hit. He could feel blood trickling down his forehead and down his back, and he could feel his ribs starting to bruise. It didn't matter; what mattered was getting Fred back.

He needed her soft smile and her goofy hyperactive mode and her laughter and her wide eyes and her voice and her calming touch and he needed her in his arms so badly he could feel his heart constricting in his chest, and if he'd had to breathe he would've stopped. His arms ached to hold her, to wrap her within his safety zone and never let go.

“She'll be okay.”

Spike glanced over to his right, where Buffy was now seated. “She's tough,” she continued. “That girl's got a backbone and she's not afraid to use it.”

“I know,” he said, and he forced the knot in his throat out. His beautiful girl...he was going to go mad. He had to think about something else.

Yeah, right.

“You love him,” he told himself to say, and he'd have enjoyed the blush in her cheeks more if Fred was in the apartment with him.

“I do,” Buffy said quietly. “He's my steadfast support, my quiet comfort, my...my everything. He's my Xander,” she finished, as if that was all she could say. “He always has been.”

“I'm glad,” he said, and she smiled.

“For the first time in a long time, I am too.”

That was enough for him. He was glad that she was happy; it was all he'd ever really wanted when he'd been with her. If Xander made her happy, then he'd do every damn thing possible to make sure his friends stayed together.

It was odd to call them both friends now, especially so casually. But it felt good, too.

As Xander came out of the bathroom with the first aid kit in his hands, there was a harsh knock at the door. “It's Angel,” Spike and Buffy said together, before exchanging wry grins.

“You guys are creepy when you do that,” Xander said, sitting just as Buffy stood. It finally occurred to Spike just what they were doing: neither of them was leaving him alone. If one went, the other stayed. They were forming a protective tag team, and it made his heart clench even harder.

Buffy opened the door and quickly stepped back as Angel entered, with Wesley in tow. “We can't find them,” Angel said, and Spike's heart was going to dust itself at this rate if it constricted any further. “We've tried everything: spells, incantations...”

“Everything short of a human sacrifice, which wouldn't help anyways,” Wesley said quietly. “The Black Thorn knows we're trying to find them, that much we've gathered. We just haven't been able to pinpoint where their opposing spell is coming from.”

“Then we might want to call in the back up,” Buffy said, making her way over to Xander and Spike again. She sat next to Xander, and her hand gently slid over to him, resting comfortably against his side. Spike doubted she was even aware of her doing it; half of the things he did with Fred he didn't realize he'd done until he needed his hand and he found it on her shoulder, or in the small of her back. It was an unconscious thing he did, a need to feel her and hold her tight.

Buffy might not have noticed it, but Angel definitely had. Spike could see him tensing, and he felt sympathy for the vampire. Angel's cheerleader was gone for good, and Buffy was well out of his reach, and Spike was fairly certain that this relationship was going to last. Her and Xander were comfortable together, beautiful together, and it had to hurt Angel to no end to see her so happy with another man. One Angel had once called a bitter enemy at that.

“What's back up?” Spike asked, hoping to turn the conversation from Angel's growing unease back to what mattered the most right then and there: finding Fred. “And please tell me it's fast.”

“It's as fast as picking up that cell phone you distrust so much,” Buffy said, “and calling its enchanter. We need Willow.”

~Nebula

Comments

[samson28.livejournal.com]

fab stuff!

[ex-dark-ami.livejournal.com]

My heart goes out for Spike, but he seems to be keeping remarkably calm.

Loved the Spike & Xander bonding and that Spike gave Xander his blessing. It was a lovely scene.

Excellent update as always. :)

[lilithbint.livejournal.com]

what a neato chapter,
so sweet.
(I'm channelling my inner Fred)

[umbralillium.livejournal.com]

*glee!* Loved Buff and Xan tag-team comforting Spike. ^_____^ 'Bout time you brought Wills in. What about Giles, though? doesn't he get to join in the fun? *pouts prettily*

[jesterlady]

Of course you need Willow.

Poor Spike. Good thought processes here! Love it!

[bubble-blunder.livejournal.com]

YAY! Spike and Xander bonding. And I am so surprised at how much I am liking the thought of Buffy and Xander as a couple. Can't wait to see the rest of this one.

~Lisa