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Oct. 14th, 2006 11:56 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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tamingthemuseTitle: Watching
Fandom: Firefly
Prompt: Riptide [a strong surface current flowing outwards from a shore]
Warnings: None
Rating: R
Summary: River looks into the subject of feelings and how people feel and think. A gen fic that basically goes along with canon. [which is pretty odd for me] and can be placed in almost any point of the series.
It comes from the inside. Feeling. Like a riptide.
It’s so solid deep down, so real, like nothing else on the borders of existence. Sometimes she wonders if she’s just a sharp, bright sphere, almost the size of a fingernail, hard as a diamond and just as cold, and her body is just a soft and foggy extension. She’d like to know what exactly people are when they feel, or more accurately, when the feelings change, flow from desperate to happy, from sad to light hearted, from jealous to safe. She knows she won’t be able to see all the other tiny gems inside the bodies moving around Serenity, but she can watch them and perhaps researching feelings by observing them is the only possible way of understanding them.
Which is why River sits herself on the catwalk and stares at the cargo bay where the captain and Inara are talking. River can’t hear them, but she doesn’t really need to. She watches Inara smile, which is always interesting because that’s something she can do just like River can count, but the Companion smiles just like River dances. Honestly. River likes that, because maybe if Inara’s happy here, her need for freedom disappears and she stays on board of Serenity and makes the captain happy. Maybe she’ll smile broader and let the tiny ruby inside shine brighter. Maybe the captain finally sees the light. Because that’s what Inara is, a light that’s needed by many and loved by few.
The captain is much more difficult to read and understand. The way he feels is irregular and cracked, as if something was holding him back. River’s not surprised, she knows Mal’s feelings are exhausted. Mal’s too tired to feel well. Thinking is easier, but River knows all about thinking from the countless hours spent around her brother, who thinks more than he feels, or at least wants to, which usually ends in him opening that dumb mouth of his. Contrary to Mal, Simon prefers thinking to feeling, assuming that if you keep things cool and logical, the bad emotions won’t happen. It’s a fallacy, River knows that, having observed people feel and think for long hours that day, she knows perfectly well that thoughts and feelings are interlinked and knotted together so tightly that only the most desperate and torn people would try and divide them. That fit her brother and the captain to a T.
Kaylee came into the cargo bay along with Wash and that was enough to make River herself feel something. The tiny diamond inside her stirred and heated up. Kaylee and Wash’s endless supply of cheer and joy seems to be almost overflowing, it’s absolutely unstoppable. And nobody really wants to stop it. Who would want to hide such pretty ambers from the world? Those two seem to be the easiest to research. River makes a mental note to watch Zoe later. How do *her* feelings work? She must be a fascinating subject.
A few hours of passive gathering information River is only sure that the difference between one ‘I’m happy’ and another is not the happiness itself, but the person who feels it. It doesn’t really help her, because she really hoped to know more about her own feelings. She’s only found out how much Wash loves his wife and why the captain will never ask Inara to stay.
Since it’s pretty useless knowledge, River is happy to move on to another project. She stands up and dances to the kitchen area accompanied by music no one else but her can hear.
Fandom: Firefly
Prompt: Riptide [a strong surface current flowing outwards from a shore]
Warnings: None
Rating: R
Summary: River looks into the subject of feelings and how people feel and think. A gen fic that basically goes along with canon. [which is pretty odd for me] and can be placed in almost any point of the series.
It comes from the inside. Feeling. Like a riptide.
It’s so solid deep down, so real, like nothing else on the borders of existence. Sometimes she wonders if she’s just a sharp, bright sphere, almost the size of a fingernail, hard as a diamond and just as cold, and her body is just a soft and foggy extension. She’d like to know what exactly people are when they feel, or more accurately, when the feelings change, flow from desperate to happy, from sad to light hearted, from jealous to safe. She knows she won’t be able to see all the other tiny gems inside the bodies moving around Serenity, but she can watch them and perhaps researching feelings by observing them is the only possible way of understanding them.
Which is why River sits herself on the catwalk and stares at the cargo bay where the captain and Inara are talking. River can’t hear them, but she doesn’t really need to. She watches Inara smile, which is always interesting because that’s something she can do just like River can count, but the Companion smiles just like River dances. Honestly. River likes that, because maybe if Inara’s happy here, her need for freedom disappears and she stays on board of Serenity and makes the captain happy. Maybe she’ll smile broader and let the tiny ruby inside shine brighter. Maybe the captain finally sees the light. Because that’s what Inara is, a light that’s needed by many and loved by few.
The captain is much more difficult to read and understand. The way he feels is irregular and cracked, as if something was holding him back. River’s not surprised, she knows Mal’s feelings are exhausted. Mal’s too tired to feel well. Thinking is easier, but River knows all about thinking from the countless hours spent around her brother, who thinks more than he feels, or at least wants to, which usually ends in him opening that dumb mouth of his. Contrary to Mal, Simon prefers thinking to feeling, assuming that if you keep things cool and logical, the bad emotions won’t happen. It’s a fallacy, River knows that, having observed people feel and think for long hours that day, she knows perfectly well that thoughts and feelings are interlinked and knotted together so tightly that only the most desperate and torn people would try and divide them. That fit her brother and the captain to a T.
Kaylee came into the cargo bay along with Wash and that was enough to make River herself feel something. The tiny diamond inside her stirred and heated up. Kaylee and Wash’s endless supply of cheer and joy seems to be almost overflowing, it’s absolutely unstoppable. And nobody really wants to stop it. Who would want to hide such pretty ambers from the world? Those two seem to be the easiest to research. River makes a mental note to watch Zoe later. How do *her* feelings work? She must be a fascinating subject.
A few hours of passive gathering information River is only sure that the difference between one ‘I’m happy’ and another is not the happiness itself, but the person who feels it. It doesn’t really help her, because she really hoped to know more about her own feelings. She’s only found out how much Wash loves his wife and why the captain will never ask Inara to stay.
Since it’s pretty useless knowledge, River is happy to move on to another project. She stands up and dances to the kitchen area accompanied by music no one else but her can hear.
